epidemiology | EVENT ★ GONE FISHIN'

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EVENT ★ GONE FISHIN'

Thanks to your help, repairs to the flood wall are complete. The Nalawi are still largely without their Gifts, so they are thankful -- without the aid of ALASTAIR recruits, they would have surely drowned or been eaten by sea monsters.

Despite the barely averted disaster, the residents of Komo have decided to go along with their lives as planned, perhaps to bolster morale instead of giving into despair. By chance, their annual fishing contest is scheduled for today! As honored guests, recruits are invited to participate.

FISHING CONTEST

Dugout canoes are provided for all participants, patterns that suggest fish scales burned into the wooden sides. Curiously, no fishing rods are offered; if a recruit requests one, they will be given a strange look, but the harbormaster will acquiesce.

Due to the rough seas, the passage between Komo and the other islands is still inaccessible. Contestants are reminded to stay behind the reefs or venture east toward open ocean for their quarry. It’s only when the contest begins that the quarry in question is actually announced . . .

Sharks.

You are fishing sharks. And, judging by the lack of equipment (or the puny fishing rod you requested), you’re expected to do this by hand.

The tiny deer people don’t seem bothered by this predicament at all: the goal is to catch the biggest shark, by length and poundage. Better not embarrass yourself in front of the locals.

GET PUMPED

Mettaton has announced over the jewelry that he will be hosting a celebration in tandem with the fishing contest, in order to help the native Nalawi and the ALASTAIR recruits get to know each other better. This includes singing, dancing, and all sorts of different performances -- and, of course, reporting on the actual fishing.

If you aren’t the fishing type or maybe you just need a break from chasing sharks around, this is a good chance to bust a move and show your teammates how you can get down -- or just sit back and watch! It’s bound to be entertaining one way or another.

Plot for the stage here!

Olivia will be the final performer in the showcase. Anyone who witnesses her dancing may feel themselves super-charged by the spectacle . . . with possibly unexpected results! Characters may feel even more determined to win the fishing contest, or perhaps they’ll take this surge of optimism to help rebuild some of Komo’s destroyed buildings before the day winds down into night.

THE FEAST

After the fishing contest, the sharks will be collected and prepared. Grilled shark, fried shark, shark caviar, and shark jerky from the results of last year’s contest. There are fruits and vegetables and breads available as well, but if you want some protein, you’d better go native.

During the feast, some of the Nalawi perform dances and song. The subjects range from their goddess Nalanni to love songs. Want to show off your talents again? Now’s the time! Or, if you’d prefer to step away from the excitement, the beach is quiet and empty, and the baths are unoccupied since the whole of Komo is at the gathering.

As the feast winds down, the Nalawi will pass around their very potent alcohol for a toast to Komo’s health. Someone shouts, interrupting, wondering what good that will do if Nalanni has abandoned them. Concerned murmuring fills the gathering, spoiling the mood. ALASTAIR recruits may attempt to put them at ease -- otherwise, the feast will disperse on a sour note.

OOC INFO

If you would like your character to win the fishing contest, please sign up below. You must thread out fishing in order to participate in the drawing. There will be only one winner, decided by RNG. The winner will be contacted on April 1st. The prize is a necklace of shark’s teeth, which has a one-use spell that will make all sharks in a one mile radius sleep for 30 seconds.

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[Rick had been dancing, but he can't dance to this garbage. It's awful. Rhys may have noticed him on the other side of the feast before, yelling obnoxiously to 'play something with a beat' -- which is kind of a ridiculous request, since this shark-hunting song has a beat already. But it's just not good enough.

Anyway, this old guy who apparently likes to yell at deer is over here now, balancing a bunch of tiny cups in his hands.]

It's a little racist, maybe.

[ Wow, that's rude, especially because they're deer, they're not people, oh my god. Rhys is clearly offended, shooting a judging look over at Rick — is he in any position to call racism? He's an old/10, old people are always racist. He's also either drunk or getting there; Rhys actually doesn't reply to him, instead speaking at the tiny cups as he tries to count them in his mind. ]

Okay, why does everyone think that's racist? They're not even people, they're deer, they get petted, it's what they do.

[Rick holds up his hands and raises his eyebrows the way you do when someone says something totally outrageously bigoted in your presence, just like, out of nowhere. Well, he tries to, anyway. He is holding all these tiny cups.]

Jesus, guy! We're guests here.

[ WOW, RUDE. Since nobody is agreeing with his clearly right viewpoint — are they not deer??? — he just crosses his arms, looking out at the gaggle of drunk-off-their-asses deer. Aside from all the racism accusations, it's not a bad shindig. ]

I wasn't actually going to pet them. Just... hypothetically. Hypopetically.

[Was that a fucking pun, pls don't. Rick just responds with a bit of a withering, long-suffering stare. He has been to the pun dimension. Don't give him flashbacks, dude.]

Well hypothetically keep your mouth shut. I don't need you blowing this for me. [For him specifically, yes. He downs the contents of one of these tiny cups like a shot, then just kind of drops it like it's the least important thing in the world now that it's empty.]

Last world we were on, we all wound up being fucking wanted criminals because some people can't stage a prison break without letting everyone in the world know about it.

[ Littering is a crime, too, jackass. Being rude to Rhys isn't, but it should be, and he doesn't have the best track record in the 'getting along with people' department — he could easily fuck this up by being... Rhys-y. Rhys-esque.

However, judging other people is his favorite hobby! And boy, are there people to judge here. None of them have even played Pong, probably, or seen a radio. With an unwarranted air of superiority: ]

Well, that's because they probably tried to unlock the cell door by answering its riddles three. [ He immediately does the worst thing a person can do: explain the joke. ] ...You know. Because everyone is from fairy-tale-dragon-land?

[And it's time for Withering Stare II: Son of Withering Stare.]

...yeah. I got it.

[This fucking guy. Rick knocks back another "shot," letting the tiny cup drop again once he's done. He's going to be standing in a pile of tiny cups soon. One of the Nalawi hears the cups clatter against each other and glances over with a weird look.]

Please tell me you have s-some other skillset aside from sh--uuurrr-- shitty jokes. [He gestures at the robo-arm.] Is that just for show, or what.

Shitty jo— [ He's ready to be dramatically offended, because his sense of humor is adorable and charming, how dare you, but. He so wants to show off his cybernetics to someone who doesn't look and sound like they're from Ye Olde Times. Rhys has been tragically underappreciated so far, after all. He swallows his offense. ]

Hah. Yeah, I just hacked my arm off 'cause it would look cool. [ It's totally appropriate to hack your arm off for other reasons. ] ...It does look cool, though, am I right?

[ It would look cooler if it wasn't in Hyperion Yellow™, but it is Hyperion property, as is his entire being. Besides, he figured it was the color Handsome Jack would've gotten; it would have looked cooler on Jack, of course. Even if it was neon pink with unicorns and bunnies all over it. He'd make it work. ]

Obviously, it does things.

[The only charming person around here is Rick!! Don't front. He does not comment on the dismemberment thing, though, because he has probably met some people who cut off their limbs for coolness points. The galaxy is a wild, weird place and body modification can get real crazy once you get past Cygnus.

But he is interested in the arm itself, if not its exact purpose for being there. For example, is it hackable? Does it come in colors that aren't eye-searing? Would it set off a metal detector? All important things to know.]

Were you going for "look at my robo-arm"? 'cause that's what I'm getting from it. [Not that Rick is King of Subtlety. He gestures with an open palm; he's waiting for a demonstration.] Fair warning: If you tell me it "picks up chicks," I'm gonna shoot you.

Well, I wasn't gonna say that before, but thanks for the idea.

[ It totally doesn't pick up chicks, though. "Hey, baby, wanna feel the cold metal touch of my robotic hand?" just doesn't work. He flexes the arm — although there's no actual muscles to flex, so it's really all for show. ]

It's way stronger than my other arm, for one. [ Looking at him, that's not saying much. His flesh arm looks like a spaghetti noodle. ] I can bring up holograms on it, too. Or... I could, I'm still trying to figure out how to get this hooked up to something.

And it's a flashlight.

[ Truly the most important function. It sounds lame saying it all out loud, though; he pauses for a moment, frowns for a split-second, then points up to his blue eye. ]

This thing's even better, though.

[Wow, a flashlight, so cool. It's alright, though, because Rick has basically stopped listening by this point; he takes his mini-computer out of the inside of his coat, yanks the pull-string cord out, then unceremoniously just grabs Rhys's arm to plug it into whatever resembles a port. What personal space?]

Uh-huh, fascinating, David Bowie. Do your hologram thing.

...Well, I feel violated. [ Who plugs his mini-computer into another man's arm without asking?? At least buy him dinner first. ] You could've asked.

[ He would have said yes, if only to show off, but it still would have been nice to have the appearance of control over the situation, at least. As it is now, Rhys feels like a glorified projector. Still, he does the hologram thing, like so.

It better not be porn or he swears to god. ]

[Look, there are drinks involved, this is practically a date. Whatever happens in Nalawi stays in Nalawi.

Points for Rhys when he just does what Rick says, though. Complaining is fine as long as you do the thing anyway -- he's well on his way to becoming yet another "assistant" for whatever schemes Rick comes up with. Compliance is a virtue.

Anyway, it is thankfully not porn, just a tasteful nude, if tasteful nudes are planetary maps. That one island can look like a dick if you squint, I guess.]

Fuuu--urrgghh-- uuuck, that's hot. [He quickly flips through a few screens (some of which may or may not actually be pornography), just to test it.] You probably don't loan that thing out, huh?

Seeing as it's my actual arm that is attached to me, not really.

[ Rhys scrunches up his nose in distaste. The whole removal process is really gross. Lots of wires coming out of his body. Some of the ne'er-do-wells present might be all right with that, but they aren't the ones ripping their arm off. ]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, go back. If you're gonna look at stuff with my arm, I at least get to see it. Since, you know, my arm.

That's your issue? [You can rent out other parts of your body, why not your actual, attached robo-arm? Lower your standards.

Rick rolls his eyes like this is a huuuuge waste of his time, letting the guy with the hologram arm dictate what they're actually looking at, but he flips back a few screens. This is thankfully not pornography, but a map of the Nalawi islands. Or Rick's estimation of what the islands look like; he is not a cartographer and it's hard to look at coastlines via portal gun.]

I don't need your arm, you know. Y-you were the one bitching about it.

I think you're forgetting you're the one who randomly plugged something into my arm. I wasn't, you know, begging for you to randomly plug something into my arm.

[ He already gets bullied by the person inside his head on a regular basis. He doesn't need to take this shit. Rick is the only person with any technology he's seen so far, however, and Rhys immediately hones in on it. Suck up to the geezer, get access to tech. As far as plans go, it's one of his less devious ones.

He gestures to the hologram screen with his flesh hand, craning his neck to look at it properly? ]

Where'd you get this? [ It isn't like Nalawi has Google Maps. (Or does it???) ] Is it cool if I save it?

[ Can I jack ur maps, bro. ]

[Rick glances over suspiciously, because this guy can save shit on his robo-arm? He has a lot of things in his mini-computer he would not like to get spread around, and he already has one person (or Gem, as the case may be; it's Peridot) who has downloaded all his shit.

He's upgraded his security since then, but still. One can never be too careful.] Uh... yeah. Gimme a sec.

[Rick taps a few things on his mini-computer, locking down all his other files with a very aggressive firewall. This is not suspicious.]

There. G-go ahead. Do you just... download it into your arm, or what?

Oh. That... wasn't sketchy at all.

[ He's attempted (and occasionally succeeded) to get around firewalls before, but Rhys feels absolutely no need to try this time; he doesn't want to know what dark secrets are hidden in the folders probably labeled "TOTALLY NOT PORN." Some things are better left unknown. ]

It's... uh. [ He falters, still thrown off by Rick's conspicuousness; he wonders if he should be concerned or just creeped out. ] It's kind of like a computer. It used to be connected to the ECHOnet, but since that's sort of a few universes down, pretty much all I've got are files. [ The hologram disappears and the look on Rick's face is enough to make him quickly unplug the mini-computer when he's done. ] Which. You have a lot of, apparently.

[Sensitive data, Rhys! Sensitive data!!! (Also probably some porn, lbr.)

Rick doesn't comment on the very quick way Rhys pulls out*, instead just tucking his mini-computer back inside his coat. ECHOnet is not a term Rick has heard of before, but he supposes different realities have different tech. He once went to a universe where the Internet was actually called the Net by like, real people.

*Phrasing.]

It has a lot of memory. [Ergo a lot of files, yes.] What kind of files are you holding?

[ Rhys raises his eyebrows. SENSITIVE. DATA. Actual sensitive data, not weird alien porn. It seems unfair of Rick to ask about his files when he'd been so cagey about his own. It's sort of a you show me yours, and I'll show you mine situation, except with more genitalia, probably. At least more alien genitalia.

Instead of letting the 'mass murderer riding shotgun in his head' thing slip, he bullshits. He's seen Fiona do it a million times, to great success; the only problem is that his lies skew towards the grandiose rather than the realistic. (Hey, maybe he should just tell the truth — it sounds like complete bullshit, anyway.) ]

Oh, you know. Top-secret information from all over the galaxies. Nuclear launch codes, Granny's apple pie recipe, that sort of thing.

[ He shrugs. ]

I'm kind of a big deal.

[Kind of a big deal.] Uh-huh. [Somehow, for some reason, Rick is not convinced by this! It's very surprising. Still, he may or may not be hatching a plan to like... remove the arm? So he can look at what files are in there? Remove the arm without chopping it off. Or maybe with. He's not too bothered about the details.]

W-well, look. This kind of shit is my deal, so if you ever wanna talk upgrades, hit me up. Rick, or, uh... eighty-two seventy-three sixty-seven seven five on your jewellery thing. [Because rattling off a series of numbers is very easy to remember.]

[ His username's long as fuck, but luckily, Rhys has a knack for numbers. Probably because he stares at them all day — or did, anyway, before everything went to shit. He narrows his eyes, inspecting Rick's face for any inclination that he might actually be planning to fuck him over.

In his experience, most people want to fuck him over. ]

Upgrades, seriously? No catch? You're not gonna plant a murder weapon on me or anything?

[The good part about being a borderline sociopath is that it is often very difficult for people to tell what you're thinking. Which is to say Rick might be planning to fuck him over. Or maybe not. Who knows! It's a real-life mystery.

Rick just shrugs in a very nonchalant way, like people asking him about the whereabouts of murder weapons is an everyday occurrence.] I mean, you'll have to pay me. The how is up to you.

Yeah, okay, I know that.

[ Rhys scowls, offended. He isn't an idiot. (Although he was definitely going to try and wrangle a free upgrade out of Rick. Guess that's not happening anymore.) ]

Do... you take IOUs? All my money's kind of tied up right now. I can loan you Dumpy? [ A pause. ] Oh, Dumpy's a robot. That's relevant info.

[Just saying, Rhys. You look like an idiot. Maybe do something about that.

Rick rolls his eyes, downing another one of these tiny cups of liquor (yeah, those are still a thing) and then just letting it clatter to the ground with the others.]

I build robots in my sleep. Payment upfront. My gen-generous nature has gotten me fucked way too many times with recruits. They like to disappear to other teams and I'm left in the red.

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dbag - 2016-04-30 21:16 (UTC) - Expand

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ricksybusiness - 2016-05-03 22:09 (UTC) - Expand

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EVENT ★ GONE FISHIN'

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