epidemiology | ( open. )

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CHARACTERS: anakin + you
DATE: mid-may main prompt
WARNINGS: skywalkers.
SUMMARY: catch-all. feel free to wildcard a prompt if you prefer or pm me to set one up.

[ the debate remains ongoing, but anakin has since tuned out. the solution is obvious — was obvious before they received their directive. the good of the many vs the two. two who would sink the world they stand on into the mire regardless, if left unchecked. it isn’t a choice.

the lightsaber in his hands sputters, fizzes out. the creak of leather accompanies the tightening of his fist. no choice, at all.

once, he had company on his patrols. the padawan has been gone almost a year, however, and the master… anakin truncates the thought. the mention of obi-wan still brings a tight ball to the base of his throat, all petty resentment and muted fury. on some level, he knows he should be grateful. obi-wan — a great jedi — took it upon himself to look after anakin’s son. that is a debt he would never be able to repay. in practice, anakin cannot look past obi-wan fulfilling a role that should have been his.

plagued by the errant nature of his thoughts and with meditation a more futile exercise than usual, he falls back on old habits for want of something, anything, to do. it’s the closest he comes to solace ( though that is an exaggeration growing greater with each passing day. )

he attends mostly to the confused and frightened nalawi, offering assistance with any task, from helping with a heavy load to constructing a few more basic tools for their use. questions regarding the lack of their gifts are addressed with non-answers and anakin knows himself to be lying.

offers are not limited to the native populace. he puts forth similar questions to his fellow recruits — “everything all right?” “looking for something?” — and so he whiles away the hours. he means to be helpful. it stems the sensation of binders cinching tighter around his wrists. ]

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[ that hour of night that can just as easily be described as stupidly late and ungodly early finds anakin wide awake and stoking the fire. no nightmares keep him up. his dreams have strangely eased, in fact. his concerns, however, have only multiplied.

his hand opens. the topmost branch on the pile lifts sluggishly. intense focus along with a muted and ever present form of resentment etch across his face. his fingers tremble with the effort to keep it aloft, an effort wasted when it falls before reaching him. for something that would be effortless.

with the force so blunted so is his awareness. loki is almost upon him before anakin realizes someone else is nearby. his fingers close around the spear, then relax when he recognizes the green. ]

It’s not a good idea to be skulking around these days. [ he tells himself he’s not going to comment on the fuzz. that would be way too easy. ]

No mirrors?

[ an attempt was made. ]

[ there was no good way to keep Loki's mind off of anything: his senses are either too dulled or too sensitive. he's had to discard his tacky jacket (too hot) and his armor (too heavy), but he's left with the nagging awareness that he can't interact with his environment the same way that he could; there was nothing good about either.

despite all of the consequences of the situation that turn him into a bruised fruit, he's still got some of his more ingrained qualities, which means he's still a dirty sneak.

his eyes rove up and down, at Anakin, the expression on his face, and then to the fire. there's a shadow of a snort that sounds more like a petulant huff. ]

No magic. [ then he dismisses it with a wave of his hand and invites himself closer. ] And a more mounting, more desperate situation upon us. I thought I'd look the part.

[ his voice drips with sarcasm. ]

[Were the Force presently possible to sense in the air, it might have been swirling in furious anger and frustration around the pacing figure in black sweeping across the landscape. But then, if the Force were possible to be sensed, perhaps Kylo Ren would not be so agitated. He stalks like an animal on the hunt with nothing to focus on but his own hunger, and he is clearly looking for an outlet -- any excuse to unleash his tension on something.

He had already long swept away from the various arguments about how to handle the arrangement of the goddesses. The course was clear, even if he had once held desire to test their ability to grant power to those who followed them. But once was a time before his arrogance superseded his greed, and his indignation prevented him from any other vote beyond total annihilation.

What sort of power takes from the Force sensitive? It was hardly a supernatural phenomenon, but a sixth sense -- to a jedi or a sith, it was like taking away their sense of sight, or their sense of touch. His reach is so small, his view so narrow, that it feels as if he might burst if he takes another step.

And yet, he continues to take such heavy steps that to an untrained eye, he almost might appear injured. But the darkness in his eyes, the deep breaths he takes -- there will soon be a victim. The Nalawi appear to understand this, scurrying from his path and subsequently past and away from Anakin as he comes closer.

His fury has no outlet, it has no power, its just--there. Its haunting him, even as he strides up alongside his grandfather.]

Are they still arguing?

[Asked low in tone, an attempt at parting gritted teeth failed. He hadn't approached the discussions directly -- at least, not after the few fools lobbying for pacifism had spoken up. It wasn't an exercise in restraint so much as a bid for survival. He could take many of the recruits, of that he was certain -- but not quite that many.

And he's not entirely certain that Anakin would have sided with him, should he had decided to attack them for their idiocy.]

Make yourself comfortable. [ wryly; as if loki had not already taken it upon himself already to join. the corner of his mouth tracks upward in mocking gesture. ] It’s practically in the directives.

[ agreement with what needs to be done does not signify agreement with the methods taken up to this point. their “training exercise” failed to impress anything upon him, but for the organization’s collective arrogance; the lousy handling of this mission has only solidified that opinion. whatever past successes seem more likely due to luck, than any skill or hint of efficiency.

anakin tosses a few more pieces into the blaze. the flames lick greedily over them. most of the wood has come from unusable remains of furniture, roofs. things neither he or luke could find new life for except as fuel.

all this for want of energy.

( some continue to believe what he does is ‘magic.’ let them. those who with the capacity to understand do. a field of energy is nourished by him and nourishes him in turn. that he can sense it still, diminished though it is, that the force has not yet forsaken him is the only reason he is not calling for nalanni's head with the others. ) ]

[Ban hadn't ever met Anakin, but he understood the nature of gossip. Shop-owners, the local workers and hunters and close-knit family members spoke with one another about the events of their days enthusiastically when they were among one another. Ban blended in well among them as a drunk who happily laid himself out in the sun to sleep off alcoholic dazes.

In opposition, Anakin became a minor fixture in their gossip. They talked about members of ALASTAIR, sometimes with praise and sometimes with fear in their words. Ban caught wind of it, learning about a few of the others just by rumor-mongering.

He recognized Anakin without even having seen his face, before. He huffed, blowing hair from his eyes while laid out in a bush, uncomfortably trying to get some sleep. Anakin must have been helping a family fix a few of their tools to repair their home from the recent storm.

Ban didn't bother looking at him as he gave him a minor appraisal.]

It ain't worth it-- giving 'em false hopes.

[He could hear the whispered reassurances, at least. Anakin had been a good person, trying to help them that way.

Ban was a cynic.]

[ probably dragged him off by the ear lecturing about letting idiots be idiots, and then doing whatever needed to be done anyway. #life lessons with anakin skywalker. ]

Last I heard.

[ one look at ren is enough warning: he wants for blood. rather than waste his breath with a caution, anakin turns away from the main road. as certain ( arrogant ) as anakin remains in his skill — without the force and without his lightsaber, kylo ren is still no challenge to him — better to reduce the potential for collateral damage. ]

Discussion was finally turning from what should be done to how, [ he proceeds before they have gone far. the 'what' is left unsaid, but plainly understood.

in this purpose, he and ren — along with the more vocal recruits — are in agreement as much as it may rankle. but where ren feeds his rage unchecked, anakin nurses his privately behind a pressing need for control. he cannot give into base emotion; he is a jedi; he is above such displays. ( and he repeats it again and again whenever and as long as he needs to for it to begin to sound true. ) ]

[ a gulf lay between being a good person and trying to be one. once, anakin had been the former, he was sure. once, the jedi too had been everything they were meant to be. time painted ugly streaks across the once gleaming mirror's shine. the war cracked it.

not a jedi's edict, then, but a simple desire to help nursed by a young boy on a desert planet who owned nothing to his name, not even his own name — nothing but an incredible skill all his own to fix whatever was set before him — had him addressing every problem with which he was approached. or he tried to. things were easy to fix; people proved ever resistant.

anakin accepted the family's thanks with a bowed head and a small smile, his humility on this occasion not feigned. he refused to accept anything else. were the force anything more than a whisper on a breeze, he would have known the resident drunk was awake. as it was, he only looked over when the other spoke, features settling into something more reserved, making him look older than he was. ]

It prevents a panic. [ would prevent yet another riot in yet another desperate and terrified populace. ] At least for the time being.

[ cynicism proved a shared thread, no matter the galaxy. ]

[ it isn’t rare for sunrise to find anakin already awake. something easily ascribed to his sense of malaise ( growing as the force weakened ), but the simple fact is he’s a morning person~~, and darth vader’s existence suddenly makes a lot more sense.~~

that also means not everyone is awake or particularly keen to find themselves so at an hour where the nalawi’s sun still flirts with the horizon. as has become habit in the past weeks, he goes fishing, spear in hand. anakin retreats to the shade with his catch, and with the sounds of activity from the town reaching him, makes the call.

not worrisome ( for once. ) a brief request to meet. after, he continues working…until the monkeys show.

one first. then a curious friend. within minutes he has half a dozen, and all work has stalled. the more daring of the monkeys climbed onto his shoulder and clings to anakin's neck, chittering excitedly.

he doesn't deserve this. ]

Edited 2016-05-23 00:08 (UTC)

[ it's warm, if anything.

as a Frost Giant, and as a god, the cold has never been a problem. now, there are goosepimples rising on his skin, threatening to remind him of just how mortal he's become. ]

Ah, yes. Those. Well, our directives can fuck right off.

[ harsh circumstances and harsh words, though he sounds more bitter than agitated. Loki's generally rather collected and whimsy, but the spiral was there, and he had tripped right into it.

he finds a rock and plants his butt on it, his brows knitting in over-exaggerated thought. ]

I think I'll be as uncomfortable as I wish.

[ just to be a brat. ]

[ anakin's eyebrows raise. first, at the crasser language than he has heard from loki, higher at the other's brilliant decision to — end up with numb asscheeks.

yes. that will show alastair. loki: the hero they all deserve. ]

When you've completely lost sensation, [ he offers helpfully, ] there's moss over here. [ 'here' as in the deadfall anakin has claimed for his seat. ]

[Anakin's reply seems to simmer his anger ever so slightly. Idleness was an evil creature, left him thinking about Snoke's absence, his mother, his father.]

Alright. [A slow exhale through his nose, and a pointed stare switch to Anakin.] How?

[The question is two-fold. Neither of them are weak men -- Anakin has a metal hand to boast with, and Ren's pain tolerance could be considered legendary. But neither would stand up to gods.

And without his reach, he felt small. Vulnerable. Even moreso, when considering their potential enemy.]

[ Loki: 1, ALASTAIR: like 20, probably.

being human and being caught in the current debate doesn't make his mood any better. he'd rather something feel numb, even if it's his poor behind. ]

Perhaps I'll be useless to them after I've lost complete feeling in my backside. Alas, how terrible for our employers.

[ you are not so subtle, Loki. ]

[ when anakin skywalker thinks you need to chill…

although — it's easy to see where this might feel personal to a professed god. it brings to mind something else. ]

You were in Chantes, weren't you? [ those he had asked had come in late: right after they were called back ( as he had. ) but from the shape of some arguments, something similar had transpired then. anakin folds his arms inside his sleeves. ]

What happened there?

[ it's a little personal. killing the gods for moral reasons, survival reasons, or other reasons he could manage to parse; killing gods to deny their existence is another matter that hits far too close to home. it wasn't long before the domino fell in the wrong direction, considering ALASTAIR's eclectic taste in recruits. ]

Ah—well ... I was. [ changing the subject to something other than Loki's dissent seems to work. his fingers go to the back of his head, and he scratches the nape of his neck. ] There had been recent social disputes in Chantes between goblins and humans, growing distrust between them began to turn violent. A fellow named Michel, along with his brother and other halfings began to whisper of revolution. They blocked the sun using sorcery, spreading fear for their own pain. Michel went mad, summoned demons and staged a coup.

[ a pause, and a snort. ]

ALASTAIR recruits killed him.

Doubt it'll prevent shit. A few nice words and favors are just gonna tide 'em over for a day or two--least until we get another big storm.

[Or, until the cultists rise again. Or, until the island heaves itself up from its exploding volcano. Something was bound to happen because why in the world would anything good ever happen anywhere? Ban knew disaster was just a constant waiting for the worst possible moment to rear its ugly head.

Anakin looked annoying to him. His sedated disposition and genuine kindness seemed suspicious at best to Ban.

Having grown up in a den of scoundrels, he knew better than to trust any semblance of good from unfamiliar faces.]

[

that sounds like a reasoned and sensible approach to the problem. as does the current proposed bout of violence. ~~how the hell are you a jedi?~~ moreover, it clarifies one of the points the opposition has been espousing. ]

Sounds like the recruits have a preferred method for dispatching their problems. [ the sarcasm is a subtle lace through the words; the risk so obvious as to be evident even to him.

a group as fickle and not beholden to any authority such as they allowed to be judge and executioner. he cannot see another option now; if he were honest with himself, he would admit to not searching long. but these aren't jedi. they don't have the good of the many in mind. judging by those he has met, most care for nothing but the good of the one. these aren't people to be trusted with the fate of entire worlds. anakin wouldn't trust them to hold the door. ]

No consensus yet, [ drily. yet for all the headache, decisions surfaced faster among the smaller group. ] That's why the debate is ongoing.

[ he had turned the problem over himself. with a lightsaber, with the force, there would be little contest. without… anakin returns to the moment when he tried to activate the lightsaber. the weak spark. ]

This world's goddesses are a drain on energy. It stands to reason that when one dies… [ the force is an energy field. all they need is to aim for the weakest link. ]

They took liberties in stripping those in Chantes of choice—just as we're doing now. Anomalies of the multiverse turned bullies, run rampant with emotion to justify telling someone they haven't the right to exist. [ he replies a little too hotly.

Loki never liked it. hypocritical, perhaps, as he was always willing to lie and manipulate his way out of anything. however, being bused from place to place, putting whatever was deemed the great good over those left in personal struggle, it all seemed moot.

who was to say what was better for the multiverse? ]

What are we saving when our mission goals all end in death? Chantes' problem wasn't Michel, he was a symptom of a system run amok. The only thing that Chantes and Nalawi share is the notion that something needs to change.

[ says the god of chaos. ]

[ considering anakin has always been one of her more... reticent acquaintances, the fact that he should be the first to initiate contact in this instance was worrisome enough. add that to his affinity for vague reticence? well. is it any wonder that the pink-haired woman would show up, just where he'd instructed her to, out of breath and looking more than a little concerned?

yes, of course she ran over here! ]

A-Anakin...?

[ there's no time for formalities as she straightens up, trying to make sense of the scene before her.

did.. did he call her because he was getting outnumbered by sea monkeys...? ]

[His stare is tepid and furious, a sickness that plagues his features and makes his skin somehow even more pale. A few blue veins pulse and slither visibly near his neck and his temples as his temper remains at a steady boil.

And then Anakin speaks of the goddess, their drain on the world, and his consideration of their predicament.]

The Force will be free. [He sniffs, tightens his jaw to spite himself. The brief snap of pain in his face doesn't help him without the Force there now.] Yes. The conclusion is logical. So...

[His sigh is long, suffering, and an attempt at keeping himself from throwing punches at random. It would be uncouth, unbecoming, and would not win him points with Anakin. He is at least sound enough in mind to know that much.]

Why does this nonsensical argument persist? The witches must die.

[ this attitude is neither surprising nor unfamiliar. anakin saw enough of it through the war: men and women from countless species only concerned with themselves. he had grown up surrounded by it. how often would his mother sigh that the greatest problem of the universe was that no one would help anyone.

the memory of his mother settles thick as silt. he has to swallow it back down; swallow the initial urge to snap, so unbecoming to a jedi. anakin encountered one other like this among the recruits. that conversation ended shortly after. tolerance has always ranked among his most underdeveloped traits. tolerance for an opposing viewpoint…that is something better left to his former master or to his wife.

his expression does not change a millimeter, but his voice cools. ]

It seems like you've already made up your mind. [ any explanation will not be worth the effort. not for this kind of narrow-mindedness. ] Was that all?

[ anakin seemed suspicious; ban has already been dismissed as yet another selfish coward. ]

[ 'what are we saving when our mission goals all end in death?'

anakin's eyes snap to loki in a fixed stare. what are we saving is an argument he heard more than once, asserted in many different voices in many different worlds. it is an argument he heard espoused in more decorated language in the senate, and in more callous terms from ryloth to mandalore. it echoed in a tribunal as justification for an act that could not be justified. ]

A lot needs to change. [ anakin speaks of nalawi, of alastair. the one to survive; the other to be tolerated. and he speaks with an eye cast to his own future, paradoxically growing darker as more and more comes to light. it feels like the cruelest form of clarity. one day, everything he has fought for will be reduced to ash. one day, time stops for him…and it stops for padmé.

the shudder works its way from his chest to his spine. not for any noble reason does anakin take issue with alastair's mission statement. they wish things to remain as dictated. he'll be damned if he allows his wife to die. he'll be damned if his son grows up in a vicious desert without knowing either of his parents. it is a secret desire, nursed quietly in the recesses of his heart ( a dangerous place for anything to be. ) he hasn't yet told luke; he doesn't yet know how it'll be done; only that it will because he wills it to. ]

ALASTAIR claims our continued existence is proof of their method's success. [ his tone is careful: honed over years of addressing a censorious council. ] It's not enough. Neither is leaving every decision to a group that seems more focused on what is convenient today.

[ gently puts in vote for dictatorship. ]

[ anakin looks significantly grumpier than is his wont — grumpier still when he realizes he has an audience. for some reason, he was not expecting her to run. his mistake. he really should have foreseen that, force or no.

there is no time to salvage any part of this situation, however. and so, gathering up every bit of dignity left to him ( not much ), he faces her. sitting on his shoulder, fascinated, a monkey plays with his hair. ]

This isn't why I called you. [ just making that clear right out of the gate. ]

[ anakin grabs him by the arm, brings them both abruptly to a stop. by then, they're far from the closest house, and they haven't passed any nalawi. good. he'd rather not be almost gored for trying to save them. ]

And they will. There is no other option. But we'll be going in blind — worse than blind — and we'll need weapons. That will take time.

[ asking a dark side practitioner to calm down is laughable so anakin opts for a sharp, ] Remember the purpose here.

( he was going to meet Anakin Skywalker.

that still hadn't sunk in. a part of him still felt like it had to be a weird, hilariously unfunny joke, that he was just too delighted to fall for. because Star Wars was a movie, not reality, no matter what the long scrolling text at the beginning of the movie claimed. you couldn't meet Anakin Skywalker outside of Walt Disney World, because he wasn't actually real.

only, for all intents and appearances, he seemed to be. which was pretty amazing and confusing all at once. it made Peter wonder, in other versions of universes, were other 'fictional' characters real? was that possible, for strings to cross like that? apparently so, and it was kind of delightfully unexpected, even if it was a little uncanny. Anakin had agreed to help set up a radio device for the natives, now that they were going to be leaving them without any of the abilities they'd grown accustomed to using. if anyone could help him with that, it'd definitely be the guy that built C-3P0 from the ground up. Peter had made all sorts of ridiculous devices, but so far no droids. please, nobody challenge him to make a droid.

he's already at the agreed upon meeting room in the in, the bits and pieces he's collected spread in front of him feeling a little meager. he hopes it'll be enough to put something together. considering the state of things, it really did feel like the least he could do. Peter wanted no part of the euthanization of 'goddesses', no matter what the weird Timeline thing had dictated. at least making a radio would be a good distraction.

too good, actually, because he doesn't notice when his company joins him. in his defense, he does not have his spidey-senses right now. to his misfortune, though, it means Anakin gets the joy of him sticking his tongue out as he concentrates. enjoy that, buddy. )

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stumbles in here a thousand years late with dunkin donuts

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are they glazed tho

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sometime before the god fight!