kisha: (shattered)
Hayame 「Honor Tsundere」 ([personal profile] kisha) wrote in [community profile] epidemiology 2018-02-21 04:37 am (UTC)

Even if I could-

[She cuts herself off before she says the rest, sharp, bestial canines digging in to her bottom lip with a harsh quiver that threatens blood, struggling still to uncurl her fingers, lower her tail, unlock her knees, do anything that might give the illusion that she wasn’t a second away from kicking through a wall.

Even if she could. Even if she had the gods accursed words.

Shed never been called upon to explain anything. No one wanted the opinion of a jinba on anything but the tasks they were assigned. She isn’t good with words, about even the most mundane of topics... and she’d spent her whole life hiding from the truths of her world, the truths of her station, and the truth that no matter how good she was... she’d never be anything but a tool to the masters she sought approval and acknowledgement from. To ask her to confront that within herself, to put it into words that could be understood by people who hadn’t lived it-

It’s too much. It’s impossible.

And another weakness she doesn’t want to admit to.]


You cannot ask me to say those things-

[The things that would be necessary to explain, the dirty, ugly things that would have to be bared to make herself truly understood.]

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