The ABCs of being the Worst

[perma_banned]

CHARACTERS: Ban perma_banned -> OPEN

DATE: Week of December 7th - 12th

WARNINGS: Cursing, possible violence, theft...

SUMMARY: Multiple prompts! Thieving, training...

A - Thievin'
[There weren't many treasures to be had in either town, but there were fun things he liked to take once in awhile. Ban had spent the first few days of the week sneaking between both towns in little ratty disguises in his pursuit of: baskets. Woven, straw baskets. It had taken him hours and hours and hours, but finally he had collected enough to erect a small fortress in his room at the goblins' inn. There were whispers from little goblin children as they pushed over his door, revealing the fortress for what it was. The room wasn't terribly big, but one was greeted with a sea of the baskets, meticulously arranged to create the walls, floor and ceiling of a fortress chamber.

The newfound owner of those baskets was asleep in the middle of them, bottles of ale scattered around him in a number of directions. His door was unlocked and the children were watching with awe in their eyes.]

Do you think he's a crazy person?

He's gotta be! Do you think Graldia would give us a reward if we told her?

Why baskets, though?

B Training / Hunting / Dinner

[Ban wasn't a fan of earning his keep, but there were times he couldn't stand local food. Venturing into the woods was a bad idea even by his standards--since he knew how dark and unreliable they were. Fortunately, he was a quiet hunter and in the mood to hone a few of his spells, so he took the mood seriously.

Hunting with a bull whip, Ban snatched small animals off of branches, out of the grass and from their hiding holes like a ghost. Even among animals meant for the forest, his footsteps were light and difficult to hear. For someone who acted as if he had no grace, his training was nothing but rife with it. By the end of it all, he emerged from the forest with an arm full of rabbits and a deer hauled over his shoulder. With a glance, he caught sight of a fox hanging by the edge of the woods, watching him. Ban tossed one of the rabbit carcasses he had towards it--the fox backing away initially before grabbing it and diving back into the brush.

Then, of course, Ban settled in the field with his few supplies, setting up a spit and a fire while he went about cleaning things up. Spices were unwrapped from a leather back in his belongings and he went about making a stew. There were stolen potatoes and carrots left from his last major theft and to boot--a whole pig on a spit, which was stolen from a pen and definitely not earned in the forest.

Fanning the flames as the pig roasted, it seemed like Ban was trying to blow smoke in a certain direction, as if trying to lure in someone in particular--and, of course, someone who would tail that other one like a leech.]

C - A Tail
[Ban had a companion, after awhile--a little goblin girl who followed him through the streets anytime she saw him, watching him all day. As much as he loathed company like that, he decided to make a game of it. He'd stick a copper coin under a chair leg or beside a glass--a few little distractions he hoped would keep her off his trail.

Despite that, she kept finding him no matter where he went. After awhile, it got irritating.

Suffice to say, people looked confused as--while, walking down the street--Ban reached into a basket and yanked out the little girl by the arm, glowering at her.]

You done hangin' around me, yet? You want somethin' from me, brat?

[What was really worth noting was the fact that she didn't seem afraid at all, but she was definitely too nervous to say anything--simply staring at him and blinking.]

Comments

C

[headlining]

I think she's just curious.

[Says this four-eyed bystander - Keats gives the goblin girl a questioning look, before glancing back over at Ban. He has no idea what's going on, but why not add his own commentary because he can?]

Or, worst case scenario, you've got an admirer.

[perma_banned]

[With a glower, Ban fixed his attention on Keats after a moment--his hand opening and the girl falling back into the basket with an 'Oomf'.]

None a' your business, pal.

[headlining]

I know it isn't. [He's not leaving, though.] Are you having trouble with her?

[perma_banned]

She's just a pain in my ass--kinda like you, huh?

[He didn't spare Keats any hum in his tone. He didn't like people who carried a tone like Keats.

Anyone who was too certain of themselves and in assuming they knew what sort of person he was got on his nerves.]

[headlining]

Is that how you talk to random passerby? [He almost seems on the verge of laughing, but he refrains from it, only giving an amused "tsk" instead.] My, so aggressive. I wonder how you make friends, if you even have any.

[perma_banned]

I really don't like people like you~.

[Of course, when Ban needed to be, he could be concise. The inflection and ease in Keats' tone spoke a great deal about what sort of person he was.

Ban disliked confidence and arrogance of that caliber.]

[headlining]

[Oh, if there's one sin he relied on far too much, its his pride. He's far too egocentric. And Keats is not going to let go of this anytime soon - anything Ban says will only be used against him.]

And I should care about you liking me, because...?

[perma_banned]

Me sayin' that was just somethin' I wanted to say. Don't read too much into it.

[He set one hand on his hip and looked at Keats, expecting him to walk away at that. It was a sort of challenge in upon itself.]

A 1/2

[digophelia]

[ Meanwhile, Alice was out of Abel Inn that day, bundled up in a dark blue cloak, with a hood over her face. She wasn't sure if any guards would be after her, but then again, Alice assumed that they may have been. After all, Alice had finally lost her cool in the jailhouse. Life in the Chantes would continue one, somewhat as normal, though the air around Abel Inn was tense.

She was leaving for a short while, looking for things to create a makeshift laundry line in her room to wash clothing. A pan, laundry line, and soap, nothing too large of a purchase, she hoped. Alice was practical and often used any of her income on things she believe she could make. But today, she decided, would be a good day to do laundry.

Something normal, close to what she knew in Whitechapel, London that didn't involve unhealthy memories. But then, Alice decided she could use a basket to carry her things. It was a simple enough errand. Or so she thought.

The goblins, hilariously, were easier vendors to deal with and Alice was approaching what were obviously goblin children with a careful, soft smile. She hoped that they didn't shrink away from her, considering her previous stint. ]

Well, now, what do we have here, little ones?

[ They're cute, the way they gather around, talking amongst themselves. As soon as they see Alice, they scatter away. Frowning to herself, Alice glances to see what they are talking about.

That is... quite the impressive display of baskets, just as Alice was considering buying one. ]

[digophelia]

[ Everything is fine until she sees who it is.

Him again.

Pressing her lips together in a thin line, Alice doesn't hesitate to sharply turn on a heel and turn away, going back the direction she came. Instinctively, she she recalls where she has her knife.

Always tucked on her right hand side, hidden in the pleats of her dress. She hopes that nothing happens -- no, she doesn't expect for her presence to be so easily ignored. But it's a combination of awkwardness and irritation that Alice really picks up her pace and decides to leave. ]

1/2

[perma_banned]

Stop right there!

[Ban's hand stretched out of the door, reaching and groping at the air--]

2/2

[perma_banned]

[--Before it fell, slapping the ground while Ban resumed snoring. He groped the ground a little in a gesture that was a little too lewd for the tone he used.]

C'moooon, Elaaaaiiine~. You can take it off, riiight~?

[The snoring persisted, interrupted by a tone that definitely matched what he was saying.]

[digophelia]

[ He barely misses Alice, who almost panics having a hand reached out towards her. She doesn't even hesitate this time, she pulls out her knife, clutching it in her hand.

Elaine? Who was Elaine? Suddenly, Alice was struck with curiosity as to who he could be talking about. But judging from his hand and his tone, Alice can really only assume it has to be a woman.

What sort of woman had patience for this prat, she wondered. Torn, Alice hovers there for a moment. Arguably, hoisting her back up in the prison could have been a misguided attempt to help her, though, she highly doubt that. She can't really complain that Gintoki was so rough with him, either. ]

I'm not Elaine.

[ That's the only thing she can say while slowly stepping away. Once again, Alice finds it hard to strike a sleeping man. ]

[perma_banned]

[For a few moments longer, Ban's fingers traced the floor boards, lingering. He stirred--briefly.

With a deeper, hurtful voice--the contents of his dream turned worse and less forgiving.]

I don't care about the forest--

Just stay with me!

[Fingers dragging, the floorboards beneath them splinters as his grip tightened. Ban was lost in a nightmare relived every night for the last few years.]

Don't-- die...

[digophelia]

[ She was prepared to use that knife, just in case he would have awoken. Alice doesn't respond, she listens and replays it in her head. It doesn't explain nor excuse his behavior prior. Still, a part of her could relate to that, calling out to dead loved ones in dreams.

Did that drive him to the point of madness, too?

She took a few steps back, half-debating to nudge him out of the nightmare with another affirmation that she wasn't this Elaine, this woman. ]

You're having a nightmare.

[ Her tone was harsh as she kept a heavy distance, out of reach from his arms. ]

[perma_banned]

I'm up... [The end of the dream was enough of a shock to Ban to wake him up--but, compared to the tone he had before, the one he carried when he was awake was aloof and uncaring. He flipped over, upside-down on his even pile of baskets. Despite his splaying, the structural integrity of it all didn't seem to be compromised.]

Eh?

[So, he was staring at Alice--albeit, upside-down.]

The hell're you doin' in my room?

[digophelia]

This isn't much of a room.

[ She asked him the same thing not that long ago, didn't she?

Alice was struck with an odd thought, now that she stood and caught bits of his dreams. She was an empathetic sort, but she was also least likely to display that to Ban. She wondered what would happen if she lost to the Queen of Hearts, if she would have turned out like someone like Ban. The Queen of Hearts and her cruelty and sadism, Alice's other half that now laid in her subconscious, completely subdued.

Yet, there were moments that bits of her would show through Alice. Deciding to wash her hands of it, Alice turned to leave. She didn't want to have an altercation with Ban and didn't want to give Gintoki an excuse to hurt him, again. To put her friend in danger was too much to think about. ]

You can have it, I'm leaving.

C.

[whereismypie]

[ Dean's been hanging around town, trying for inconspicuous, and on the lookout for any of ALASTAIR's new crop of newbies (poor fellas just had no idea what they'd fallen into) just in case they ran into hostiles. or into any sort of trouble - overly concerned hero is overly concerned about everyone - so when this one big-ass dude with red eyes (a demon??? UGH) pulls a tiny kid from out of his basket, this pings Dean. pings him big time. and he's too busy focusing on this red eyes business to even notice that the little girl's not concerned at all, by the way Ban's treating her.

he narrows his eyes a steps in front the pair. ]

Hey. How about you pick on someone your own size, big guy.

[perma_banned]

Pick on...? [Ban's hand open reflexively--the little goblin child yelping as she fell right back into the basket. Of course, he understood what it looked like and normally, Ban wouldn't have cared at all to explain himself.

In that instance, though, he felt obliged to.]

Brat's been followin' me all day, pal. I've been gettin' tired of it.

[whereismypie]

[ Dean shoots a quick smile a the little goblin girl — like, don't worry kid, i got this.

then it's back to glaring at Ban. red eyes, and did he catch a glimpse of some kinda fang ...? wow, keeps getting better and better. ]

She been followin' you around? So this ain't you just tendering her up for some late night snack, huh?

[ he addresses the girl: ]

Hey kid, this for real?

[perma_banned]

The hell I am--

[Ban's hand lifted up to his face, covering it in just a touch of shame as the little goblin girl fished a few silver coins out of her pocket.]

He gave me money! And--when I follow him, nobody tries to take it from me.

[whereismypie]

[ w-well

okay

Dean was not expecting that, like, at all. he glances back at Ban. ]

Huh.

... Okay, so she seems to, uh. Like you, I guess.

[ i>but still. Dean narrows his eyes. ]

Hey — you an ALASTAIR guy?

[ probably, but it never hurts to ask. ]

[perma_banned]

[Ban narrowed his eyes in return.

He was just a little annoyed by the little goblin girl, but not entirely angry at her.]

ALASTAIR?

[He lifted a brow, wondering how Dean could tell.]

How'd you figure?

[whereismypie]

I'm psychic like that.

[ nah, just that he's been around the locals, making frenemies here and there, as Dean does.

Ban just doesn't look anything like them, the math wasn't that hard. ]

Also I like your eyes, pal. [ this is a Lie. ] Nice shade of red you got there. Hellfire red, I presume?

[perma_banned]

...If you're implyin' I'm a demon--you're way off, pal.

[The fact that Dean actually suggested it was enough to get on his nerves instantly, admittedly. If anyone hated demons more than most, it was definitely Ban.]