You are searching for an answer I cannot give you.
[Rey believes the Dark Side to be evil. In a way, she isn't wrong. Its called the "dark side" for a reason. Its unsavory to anyone who didn't have the stomach for it. For anyone who was naturally attuned to the light. He wasn't that person. He would never be that person.
Even still, Rey is -- unlike anyone else he's ever met. She believed like no one else ever could, even often knowing the futility of it. Even when she's had her hope dashed into pieces on the ground, she still found something to believe in.
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[Rey believes the Dark Side to be evil. In a way, she isn't wrong. Its called the "dark side" for a reason. Its unsavory to anyone who didn't have the stomach for it. For anyone who was naturally attuned to the light. He wasn't that person. He would never be that person.
Even still, Rey is -- unlike anyone else he's ever met. She believed like no one else ever could, even often knowing the futility of it. Even when she's had her hope dashed into pieces on the ground, she still found something to believe in.
And he has no idea what that is like.]