『伊達政宗』 ᴅᴀᴛᴇ "LET ME DO IT KOJURO" ᴍᴀsᴀᴍᴜɴᴇ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
wardance) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
epidemiology2016-06-12 11:45 pm
wardance) wrote in epidemiology2016-06-12 11:45 pm
• closed • the truth of letting go lies in the answer
who Masamune wardance & Sieglinde grunehexe
what serious life changing decisions and requests are being made.
when forward dated to after the Recollection Festivities have concluded.
where In Residence (Oska)
warnings bad mothers mentioned and some squicky bone breaking of a 12-year-old's feet ;;
[ Although he has spent plenty of time socializing already, Masamune has also spent more time than what most here who know him to have ever done silent and by himself. The library has been an unlikely background to see the young warlord in, but following the end of the end of the recollection ceremony, Masamune has spent a lot of his time flipping through bound pages.
Now, back in his room, he has brought that atmosphere with him to a chair, wearing more modern casual attire, a white dog loyally resting by his feet. For Sieglinde, the door is always unlocked and doesn't require or expect a knock (although manners would help....). He glances up over his the top of his book curiously when he hears it open, the white dog's ears twitching curiously as it raises its head to greet the newest company to join them, tail already wagging. ]
wardance & Sieglinde grunehexewhat serious life changing decisions and requests are being made.
when forward dated to after the Recollection Festivities have concluded.
where In Residence (Oska)
warnings bad mothers mentioned and some squicky bone breaking of a 12-year-old's feet ;;
[ Although he has spent plenty of time socializing already, Masamune has also spent more time than what most here who know him to have ever done silent and by himself. The library has been an unlikely background to see the young warlord in, but following the end of the end of the recollection ceremony, Masamune has spent a lot of his time flipping through bound pages.
Now, back in his room, he has brought that atmosphere with him to a chair, wearing more modern casual attire, a white dog loyally resting by his feet. For Sieglinde, the door is always unlocked and doesn't require or expect a knock (although manners would help....). He glances up over his the top of his book curiously when he hears it open, the white dog's ears twitching curiously as it raises its head to greet the newest company to join them, tail already wagging. ]
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... [ Masamune doesn't bother to say sorry (what's the point, what good will it do? Just to try and alleviate the feeling of guilt for having messed up for himself. ) Instead, he silently swallows and goes back to the task.
Carefully, before moving to finish bandaging the foot with keeping her toes from remaining limp and trying to heal back as they've been forced for so long, he moves to the last layer of bandage to undo the bandaging, this time retrying to a still tight (that can't be helped, the foot needs it) but nowhere near his initial mistake and further nothing like the binding she had to suffer through.
For the remainder he is extra careful, not caring what the mental frustration is (so goddamn stupid to be having a self pity crisis during this sort of thing. It's enough to make some as selfish as he is sick to his stomach. It was crossing another line.)
He does perhaps even better than before on the other foot with the concentration applied but he isn't in any mood to notice or feel it makes up for anything. Slowly he gets up, moving to push the basin and things out of the way so he can lean forward and pick her up, careful both to peel her off from plastering herself to the chair back and also properly scoop her up with as little disturbance to her feet as possible.
For now that he's done with it, he's able to submerge most of the uglier feelings boiling inside to simmer somewhere lower, which he counts as a blessing.
Carrying her to his room, he sets her down on the bed on her back. Before he goes to lift away and straighten back up, though, he brings a free hand to her forehead to move any strands of hair caught from the sweat and stuck to her face as a result. He also takes the time to finally speak to her since before the start of the procedure. ]
...Sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you like that. You'll be okay—it's done and you can rest now without worry.
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That couldn't be true. She knew that, too, but still... It suddenly ends. At least, the pressure and movement ceases, her feet tightly supported by splints and bandage, leaving only the throbbing pain to remain, pounding in time with her haphazard heartbeat, which she tried to steady along with her breathing, nodding to try and acknowledge Masamune's work, the movement from chair to bed, trying to wipe the tears from her cheeks with fingers still harshly curled as if they still gripped the chair arm, joints too tightly locked.
Her eyes closed again briefly, as he brushes the hair from her face, speaks, gathering herself and her thoughts.]
I asked you to... It is fine...
[She didn't think of any additions to her pain as his fault, because it would be painful beyond normal imagining either way... What would be a little more that might come from asking for assistance from someone based only on trust and physical capabilities rather than experienced medical knowledge?
She had that, at least, and as her thoughts slowly returned she gathered them up, trying to force her fingers to straighten, keep her legs ramrod straight, not to shift at all. There'd be swelling, surely infection, she'd need-]
Can you bring me my bag... And a drink, please...
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(When did he become so attached to this kid? When did she become so much of chain that he's become weak and unable to be certain he can give her the strength needed to get through even when her own gives out?
"'I would give all that I have in order to protect her.'")
... Is that what was meant back then? Masamune hasn't even thought hard on what nonsense the other was quoting and claiming to understand.
He doesn't know now, and he'll never find out—because he will never go back and bring that up to clarify.
Moving out of the room, he retrieves her things and brings them in to set on the bed for her easy reach. When he leaves and returns a second time, he's returned with something to drink but also a small-- toy? Setting the glass down, Masamune leans in to offer the plush for her to hold into. ]
This will help you sleep when you are ready to sleep but the pain is not dull enough.
[ Once she reaches to take it from him, his then empty fingers will spark to life and the lightning will twist and meld itself like vines or muscle twisting and wrapping until it takes and holds a specific shape. The Lightning familiar slowly spirals around Masamune's hand, the element crackling still here and there as it seeks completely stabilizes a form. ]
Dérkomai. [ he seems to be greeting it—it makes a static-filled and small cry of acknowledgement for its size before floating away from him and circling Sieglinde once before dematerializing near the toy dragon. ]
Try it after Kojuro sees you. Just squeeze between the wings once, it'll do the rest.
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I have not had such a thing since I was a girl...
[She almost laughs but it's too difficult for her. (And another reminder, that to her, girlhood was already a thing left far behind.) She could remember it, she thought- a black cat, soft and warm, that she had named Eben, a name only a three year old could convince of as brilliant.
But when she reached for it the lightning crackles in his hand and she's momentarily fascinated even through the pain, not even broken bones enough to stop her desire to learn and observe. Her watery emerald gaze followed it until it faded from sight, a hand weakly trying to feel around for it to see if it was invisible or actually dematerialized.]
What will it do...
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But they both spent their childhoods chasing their mother's affections. Sieglinde to carry on her supposedly dead mother's legacy and dedication. Masamune to regain the love of his mother to be able to rightfully continue as the head of the family without conflict or heartbreak.
They both came out disappointed. He wanted to be able to help her like Kojuro had helped him. Masamune realizes, however, it's a lot more complicated a situation then he imagined. Maybe just caught up too quickly in bonding due to their circumstances... He doesn't know but he worries now, uncertain if he's enough to protect her from whatever she needs to be protected from-- partially because he doesn't have the skill Kojuro does. Sieglinde has plenty of other people here should he fail to be adequate or otherwise disappear... but he doesn't want to let others compensate for his lack thereof. He tries to akin it to her basically being seen as a sibling but... Masamune understands now that may be part of the problem. Being the one who killed his own brother, whom was coddled by their mother and thus treated him in similar manner as she did.
He has no idea what a good sibling relationship is but not in the form of the relationship being merely absent. ] It will send electricity into your body and disrupt the pain. Since it blocks and creates numbness, it'll be easier to sleep with. Works better than medicine, in my experience [ --but is a lot harder to control without hurting someone or providing a power source. ]
Should do the trick when other stuff doesn't. Use it to give yourself better rest for a quicker recovery. [ He knows quite well although using it on himself is rare due to being his own power source. Becomes messy. ]
It'll stay with you while you sleep, too. Think of it like as an extra guard dog, too, I guess. Give you peace of mind.
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[Her attempt at a tease failed just as much as her laugh had, the consequence of pain that had rendered her near mute and without humor, but at least she tried, placing the dragon she'd been given by her pillow, adjusting it weakly,
Sieglinde had always failed to come up with the proper name for what Masamune was to her. It did not feel as if he was her "friend"... Not in the way Sakura was... And he wasn't someone she considered one of her "disciples", like Olivia or Graham... She had wondered for a time, in Chantes, when she'd lied and claimed to be his sister, if that's what this was supposedly like. Siblings? But in the end, she had always been an only child, and knew precious little of how a normal familiar relationship was supposed to be like.
Masamune was just... Important. Enough that she'd forgive him even for thing she hated most.]
Thank you.
[And she did mean it, because he was the only one she could trust to do this, and he had, and it was done. For better or for worse.]
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...I can say that it's not called such back home but I would only be deflecting. If you are still interested in this topic when you are better, ask me then.
[ He looks about to make her a little more comfortable, but he knows there is no reason to do so in excess since she will be disturbed soon enough.
There is a small nod. ]
Thank you, also. [ For so many things, but she would hardly remember if he started listing, anyway. ]
From now on, remember the only real way to change the past is to face the future. [ He hopes when she has those miserable feelings that will surely come that she should have continued punishing herself for the guilt over things done, she will be able to sincerely believe herself that the only choice is to push forward.
Masamune now offers a final but more sincere smile, pushing away any sadness or concern that might be lingering on his face. ]
Sleep now. You've earned it.
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Sieglinde nodded weakly, wanting to believe in those words, hoping that they would be enough to change her own mind and erase the doubt she had, lingering even then as she drained her tea, forcing herself to do it all at once in order to avoid prolonging the foul taste.
Only then did she let herself lay down properly again, nuzzling into the pillow and curling up slightly into the fetal position, pulling the dragon she'd been handed into her arms.
Tried to smile at Masamune, to assure him that she'd sleep. (And she would, because she was good at making potions and powders, and she wasn't scrimping on her own dose, not now.)]
Good night.
[It would be hours before they'd wear off, but at least she'd have that long to rest first.]